5 February 2007

From:that frolicsome kid
To:Whom this may concern
Date:5 February 2007, 17:34
Subject: Sociology? Uh-uh...  

This is a follow-up blog post from Sociology? And other thoughts...

Oh my gosh, what is wrong with me? Why am I beginning to worry about this again? This is bad, this is very bad...

Last night while I was in bed, I was hit by the sudden, sick realisation. I have not done much for Sociology, i.e. I have only covered 1 and a half big units, and there are 7 more to go. This is frustrating. I don't think I can complete all eight units in time for the exam in November. I might as well forget it and spend my energy concentrating on my 8 more important subjects, and score better marks in them.

There's just one problem though. I have to inform the deputy principal regarding my change in decision (this is the third time: first was to obtain permission to sit for this subject, second was to switch from Additional Maths to Geography, and now this...) again. Will she even approve of my decision? I have even got my parents' consent. What will they say? Most importantly, what will she say?! Will she criticise me and make me DO it, whether I like it or not?

I believe I still stand a chance though since registration has yet to be opened. Guys, I don't look forward to stand in her office telling her my change of my decision. I don't think she'll take me seriously, and she will shoot a plethora of questions hurling towards me. Questions, questions. I even tried to imagine how the meeting with her would turn out last night. I almost couldn't sleep last night.

Why did I want to drop this subject? First of all, there are still many more topics to cover. So, why did I take it in the first place? Honestly, I have no idea - I was thinking more with my heart than my head (in other words, I was too blinded by the sudden discovery of me suddenly developing an interest in this subject I went straight to sit for it in the O Levels without thinking of the effort I have to put in and its consequences). And I sort of regretted my hasty decision...


Oh boy, I'm in deep trouble. I am very afraid that she's going to request me to take up Additional Maths as replacement. I can imagine the look on my ex-teacher's face, glaring at me, daring me to tell her the reason why I made a stupid decision...

That'll be highly unlikely, but I never know. My school life is so messed up.

Did I tell you that I was afraid to tell her that I want to stop doing this subject? It's not too late right, since registration is yet to be opened. *shudder at the thought* I just am afraid to confront her and ramble nothing but mutterings. I was thinking of treating her to a cup of coffee at a local coffee shop and talk things thoroughly about my decisions.

I don't think it's necessary.

I have been badly misinformed. I should have been more patient and wait to study this subject later in Sixth Form, when more experienced teachers can deliver this subject to me properly. I lack resources as well; I cannot find past year papers online, the syllabus outline is too vague and frankly, there's a lot to remember! No, I don't think I can commit myself fully to study Sociology now.

Regrets, regrets. Oh, stupid naive me! >.<

So, should I see her? Or should I just go on and study this? (I definitely hope it isn't the latter because well...I just know I cannot go on anymore.) =(

Comments (19):

by happy and blue 2
Date:6/2/07 07:36  

I think you should just go and talk to her now. Get it over with..

Please don't be so hard on yourself! If your parents have given you their permission then you're doing the best thing. But please cut yourself some slack.
I really like your blog and the way you express yourself - except that you don't realize how bright you really are!!!
Keep it up...

If only you could use your powers for good instead of aprihention.
Go to the light my son. Listen to me for I am wise.(Although a dubious speller) I am also very small and very hairy.

Stick with it man. You'll be glad later. I know.

So, FK, did you go and say you couldn't/ no longer wanted to do it?

I hope so, if this is how you truly feel... although, it might just be panic. Could you wait a little longer, and then see how it's going? It's only the beginning of the term, after all... it might get better.

On the other hand, there's absolutely no shame in admitting a mistake. You thought you wanted to do it, you tried it, and realised that it wasn't right for now , but might be alright for 6th form... so, what's wrong with that?

You now are making a more informed decision than when you first chose the subject. I'm sure that will be respected!!

As I said before, FK, do as you feel is right...

Hey happy and blue 2! I wish I could, but somehow I am rather apprehensive about the whole thing...=\

Hey amazing gracie! I was too enthusiastic to try on doing this subject, I never gave much thought on the effort I have to put in and the number of subjects I already am juggling. I'm reconsidering now because I don't want to jeopardise my marks of my other eight subjects, plus the syllabus by CIE is kind of vague and I got no past year papers to practice, plus I am unable to grasp so much information. Besides, very few/no one in my country is sitting for the paper, I wonder why I'm even doing it...=S

Kaye, I got to admit, your comment is really funny! =D The thing is my apprehension and doubt...

I don't think so gamin because I think I have a lot to handle for now. I will reconsider picking up this subject though in sixth form. ;)

Unfortunately, I haven't annelisa. This may sound ridiculous, but I'm really afraid of seeing her (Yes, logic tells me she won't bite me; then again, she WILL be annoyed at my sudden decision to not take it. This isn't the first time...).

Well, I am panicking because I suddenly realise that there is SO MUCH to cover for my other subjects. I'm beginning to wonder if now is the right time to pick it up. Besides, my "future" sixth form teachers are better in delivering this subject, plus the syllabus will be totally different anyway. So I don't really see the point.

I have no idea why I'm so scared to see her and admitting my mistake. I'm paranoid and very pessimistic now =S. And the worse thing is, I'm really afraid things will screw up and she'll tell the other teachers and students in the school and well...

Things will be messy! =(

Why am I sooo self-conscious? I don't get it! (I know this decision is right. But at the same time, I'm afraid it will lead to disastrous consequences, whatever they are...)

By the way, I promised in my letter that I will work hard. So, I've sort of "broke me promise"...


Give yourself a break!!

Ok, I know it's going to be embarrassing, but if you've made your mind up, FK - go with it! Follow it through. So, even if you feel bad, how much worse will you feel if you continue the course? Balance it... decide which is the lesser of the two evils.... If you think that giving up the course is right, then nothing should stop you from withdrawing. If the entries haven't been made yet, believe me, She will prefer you to tell her before... not afterwards when the fee's paid!!! So, go for it, FK!

Hahahaha! Are you like a friend of hers? You know her well! =P

Seriously, you got a point there. It's better to act now than "later". I'm going to tell her within these few days, when I'm ready. Wish me luck...=\

Luck, FK!

So, did you do it yet? :-)

Unfortunately, no. =( Everytime I see her office, I made detours back to my class. =S I try again tomorrow. Hope all goes well...

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